I feel like I should blog since I haven't done so in over a week. I get this way sometimes. I wouldn't call it a funk but I just close up inside myself and don't have much to say to anyone, don't want to think about much of anything about myself, my state of mind, or my physical comfort level. Blogging forces some of that out of me and I haven't been in the mood to even think about it.
I could blame personal finance stresses - which wouldn't be enough to stress the average Joe but I worry about the slightest debt. My sensible self says to just stop spending and it will all work out since I do have an income. I know that is true and that is what I will do.
I could blame the state of the house - I never feel like I can keep up with the level of cleanliness that I so desire in my house. The dust, the laundry, the bathrooms, the floors, the laundry, the kitchen, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry...I feel like I will never have a day where I can just say: It is done.
I could blame the heat - which is probably more to the point, really. It is HOT outside and I am disheartened by the fact that my strawberry plants have been invaded by grass and weeds but are infiltrating the other areas of the garden themselves. I am also frustrated that the caterpillars are back in full force and have eaten around all of the veins of my broccoli leaves. The plants will never catch up with the nutrients they need to create some crowns for me to eat! I am also worried about the tree in our front yard. Many of its branches are bare and I can't figure out if it is sick or also being eaten. My desire to not use chemicals makes me feel like my hands are tied.
I realized today that I never bought a park pass for this year. In years past, I had a pass by May at the latest and we went to the park almost 3 times a week! I guess my gym membership is holding us back from outdoor fun. I promised Cole that we would go to the park next week when the temperature is promising to be in the low to mid 80s - bliss. I am planning on straightening out the garden next week too which will make me feel better and want to go outside again.
Putting these issues and concerns down just gets me more frustrated. I know they don't seem like much to someone with REAL problems but to me, they mean the things that usually bring me joy are stressing me out!
1 comment:
I'm totally with you. I feel like that sometimes too. That's when I discuss burning the house down and moving. It's so much easier than cleaning. And our yard is so out of control that we're going to have to borrow my in-law's more powerful mower to handle it. Really. It's shameful. We need it to be cooler so we can lose the sinus headaches and play outside again.
Dude, it's not just you. And, if you want it, I give you permission to save your tree by whatever means necessary.
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