Rhys, Rhys quite Contrary

I am dedicating this entire post to Rhys Alexander Harding - I am sure that when this ends up in the Internet cache, he will appreciate it 15 years from now as a Senior in High School when a tech savvy buddy finds it and publishes it to the school population. This is how my mind thinks, by the way.

Rhys is nearing 27 months old and is "brilliant" according to his speech therapist. He is really smart and coming along with this speech. He recognizes some numbers and letters and can fill in the blanks during the alphabet song. I work with him every day on the alphabet and hope that he can get caught up as his speech continues to improve.

I have to say he is brilliant too because he is potty training himself. That is a true statement since Chris and I only reward him and gently remind him that he may need to go. He usually doesn't take our suggestion but he has only had 5 accidents in the month that we have been letting him call the shots. Basically, I ask him if he wants a diaper, big boy underpants, or nothing at all when we are at home. He usually goes "commando" but today, he chose underpants. He has been in underpants for almost 4 hours straight and they are still dry. He occasionally tells me that he has to go but usually just tootles off on his own and takes care of his own business. BRILLIANT!

I am expecting the bad potty training challenges to come along but I hope that we all keep cool heads about it and don't create a potty monster in the process. Here's hoping!

"NO!" is his very favorite word to exercise. "Why?" comes in a close second. Here are some examples:
Me: "Do you want something to eat?"
Rhys: "No!"
Me: "Okay, do you want a drink?"
Rhys: "No, un't eat...Mama, cup'juice?" (translation: "No, I want to eat...Mama, can I have a cup of juice?")
Me: "ugh."

Rhys: "Un't go Mommy car." (translation: "I want to go in Mommy's car")
Me: "We will go in Mommy's car in just a minute."
Rhys: "Why?"
Me: "ugh."

We love to hear him say "wook at dat" because it is just too cute. I also think it is really cute that he tells us the he loves us but he just says, "Mama", reaching his arms out as wide as they go, "this much". He also asks to snuggle and gives affection when he is really happy about something. His unenthusiastic but well timed "yea" always makes us laugh too.

He loves to play outside and in the big pool at the gym. Unfortunately, no swim diapers are allowed so I struggle with letting him play along the water's edge (they have a gentle slope leading into the pool like a beach with fountains spouting up along the side) without letting him get in all the way. So far, no one has said anything and he knows that if he says goodbye to diapers, he can get in all the way!

Like chalk and cheese is a way to describe Rhys and Cole. They are so very different. I often think of Jack Sprat and his wife (you know the one where he can eat no fat and his wife can eat no lean and so between them both, you see, they lick the platter clean.) Just the other day they both had fruit cups. Rhys left all of his cherries behind and Cole left all of the other fruit behind. Now, they share one fruit cup.

He is very much my baby and I will truly be sad when he is all grown up but I am proud of how far he has come and when I look into his eyes, I still see that tiny innocent baby that I held moments after he took his first breath. Clinging to that thought is hard when he is such a bugger sometimes.

So much to give thanks for

I vowed to keep up with the blog and type everything when I got home. Well, vows are made to be broken, some at least :) I didn't even take notes. There were some funny Coleisms. Specifically, he said, "I want to watch it, kapeesh?" when we told him that we were too close to Grandma's house to watch another movie. I had taught him to say to Chris, "I want some candy, kapeesh?" a while ago and I guess he figured out what it means.
We had a lovely visit with Mom and Dad, Becky, Charlie, and Emma Grace, and Mandy, Nora, Charlie, and Keith. The kids are pictured below. We went down on Wednesday to Mom and Dad's house and then on to Mandy's house on Thursday for Thanksgiving. Cole had a potty accident but was pretty good overall. He went without a diaper and without accidents on both legs of the trip. I am really proud of him.
On Friday night, we went to Kelly and Scott's house so Cole could have some good quality play time with their boys. Kelly ended up with a spare set of tickets to Disney on Ice so Cole and I were able to go too while Chris and Rhys hung out with Scott. It was a really good time and now that I know Cole will sit through something like that, we are more likely to take him.
We got back to Mom and Dad's house on Saturday around 11am and we decorated their Christmas tree while Chris and Dad watched the Clemson vs Carolina game. Cole headed down for a nap and Chris and I took advantage of that and went downtown to wonder around.
Honestly, every time we are there, we are more and more convinced that we want to move there. Chris was easily swayed when he saw the wide selection of international restaurant options on Main Street alone. I really love going downtown.
On Sunday, we set off around 5am and, in spite of the rain, were in Richmond by noon. This pace came to an abrupt halt as soon as I took over driving and we entered traffic hell on the corridor between Richmond and Washington. We finally rolled into our drive way at 5pm. We were all exhausted. Sasha ate a little food and hit her bed hard. She didn't get up until 11am today and then was just up long enough to go outside. The boys and I stayed in our pajamas all day and I managed to get very little done.
We are so happy to have built memories over this holiday and are so glad that we made it home safely after such terrible driving conditions.

sick day

I decided to take a sick day. No, I didn't have a day off. I just took advantage of Cole's head cold and decided we would all stay in comfy clothes and veg on the couch all day. The boys were good for it and when Rhys woke up from his first nap, I realized his nose was stuffy too. By the end of the day, they both are doing fine. Cole still is a bit snotty but Rhys seems to be no worse for the wear.
I am enjoying a glass of wine and hoping to have a relaxing evening with Chris. It seems like forever since we actually spent some time together. I always feel like we are ships passing in the night...passing children between us. Maybe sometime soon we can have a date night. I have some friends who are in similar situations and we are all co-oping babysitting. I am off to Amber's house on Saturday night to keep her son and she will watch our boys in December when we go to a birthday party.
I am excited to have friends who are available for this and am actually looking forward to getting some reading done after Amber's son goes to sleep on Saturday night. It will be nice to be in a quiet house where there is nothing for me to do - laundry, dishes, etc.
Rhys is doing okay with his sleeping but last night he was up a lot because of those pesky teeth. Cole did beautifully with the potty today...no accidents, no diapers. I am so pleased!

No worse for the pancakes

I am happy to say that the Saturday morning pancake tradition is securely intact at the Harding house. I managed to NOT gain the usual weekend 3 pounds. I am not sure what was different this time because I certainly ate my share of tasty bad stuff throughout the weekend but somehow managed to stave off the gain. Maybe further study is required. I will keep you posted.
Today we had a MOMS Club activity and right before we went, Cole pooped on the potty. Once again, I apologize for all of the potty talk but this is noteworthy stuff. The end of diaperdom is a HUGE step in a person's life and we are celebrating the heck out of it around here. All day, he took himself to the bathroom when the urge struck and he had a full day without diapers and without accidents. Inside, I am doing a little pee-pee dance of my own...and not because I have to go but because I am so proud of him :) Just now, he took himself in the bathroom and Chris stuck his fingers under the door. Cole shouted, "I am going pee, leave me alone!" Chris said, "I am sticking my fingers under the door like you do." Cole shouted back, "Chill out!" We are both giggling about that.
So, I learned today about a fabulous new website/web group called freecycle.org. I registered to become a member of the Pasadena, MD group and am so excited about posting things and getting free stuff! My friend, Jessica uses it and got a whole bag of boy toys that she generously shared with us today. I got three Christmas gift worthy toys for Cole and couldn't be happier about the fact that they are free and used! Purchasing items from thrift stores and consignment shops is my way of stretching the budget and reducing our impact on the environment. I try to reuse as much as possible, recycle what I can't, and generally reduce our waste. Gently used toys are the best because there is no assembly or pesky twist tie packaging to impede your ability to start playing right away!
As an incentive for Cole to poo on the potty, I bought him a matchbox car track with a car. I bought it new from the grocery store because I needed something right away. After he was successful, I pulled it out and started the assembly process that included a full page of stickers and small bits of street signs and light posts. There was even a sticker that was destined to wrap around the caution cone! Honestly, "some assembly required" is usually not an issue for me because someone else paid full price for the pleasure of assembling the toys that we ultimately get a great deal on.
I have some really impressive thrifty friends and we find ourselves sharing our most memorable great deal stories. From coupons and rebates to thrift stores and yard sales, we all have our special tricks to surviving the budget constraints of being stay at home moms. Maybe the next Secretary of Treasury should consult us on the budget. We can pinch a penny until it screams and then toss it in a piggy bank for a rainy day.
Well, that is it for the day. I am three gifts heavier and not three pounds heavier and my purse hasn't been touched!

Another full Saturday

We started the day with pancakes and then went to Chuck E Cheese for Cole's potty training celebration. He was in under pants all day without any pee accidents. Unfortunately, he is still having a hard time committing to pooing on the potty but I have patience and he will get it within a few days. I am so excited for him and proud of him.
We came home for a break and lunch after a little light shopping and then went back out to Baltimore for the Brit Meetup.
I walked the dog when we got home and am settling down for the night. It was a full day and we had a lot of fun. I am looking forward to tomorrow and some time with the girls.

Happy Saturday!

When can we say he is potty trained?

So, Rhys was up at 5 this morning and I brought him downstairs to avoid waking up Cole and to let Chris get another hour of sleep. Cole woke up around 6 and I heard him go into the bathroom upstairs. I called up to him to let him know where I was and he came down moments later. He told me that he went pee-pee. I asked him if he took his diaper off and he said no. I assumed that he had and when I went upstairs, I mentioned to Chris that there is probably a diaper laying around since Cole must have taken it off. Chris realized that he hadn't put one on him the night before! Cole went all night without wetting the bed and took himself to the potty as soon as he got up. Is it safe to say that he is potty trained now and any time he has an accident, it is just that? I am going to say, "yes." I am proud of him and glad to know that we are well on our way to less accidents. Cole did have an accident with poo today but I think that he will soon want to avoid the discomfort and embarrassment and will poop on the potty regularly. I will be glad when my blog isn't full of potty talk.
I am hosting an at-home sales party tonight for Close to My Heart, a scrapbooking and stamp supply company. My friend, Kate, is a consultant and I hope she gets lots of sales. Chris should be home just in time to help me get the room set up. I am planning on making some pumpkin muffins and veggies with hummus dip.
I am posting this blog entry now because I am not sure if I will be up for it after the party and wanted to take this opportunity while the boys were napping.

Dance parties ain't what they used to be

We hosted a dance party as a MOMS Club activity today. It was fun but amounted to us playing some They Might Be Giants kids music and letting the kids play with toys. Cole was the only boy and I am sure he didn't mind one bit. I was happy to keep my friend's daughter while she got some studying in and she stayed with us through lunch. It was so nice for Cole to have a friend over and he was glad that she stayed after the other children were gone. He always hates to see his friends leave.
I feel like we are making great strides with Rhys and his sleeping and with Cole and his potty training. He stays out of diapers when we are home and has gotten into the swing of things pretty well. Today, he even pooped on the potty. I only mention this here because we have struggled with getting him to do that and this is only the third time ever he has done it and he took himself upstairs and did it all on his own. I am proud of him and he was proud of himself. The funny thing is that he insists that it looked like a pine cone. He came down and said, "I pooped and made it a pine cone!" That is noteworthy because it just is.
As for Rhys, he only woke up once last night and it was just before 2am. He went down at 8pm and finally woke around 7am. This is also noteworthy because we have struggled so long to get him to do it. For both of these things, I have concluded that we did little to influence the behavior. Cole will be potty trained when he is ready and Rhys will sleep through the night when he is ready.
Admittedly, I am a control freak and leaving these milestones up to my children has been hard. We read loads of books and seek advice from "experts" and fellow moms but, at the end of the day, our children will lead us and they will do things in their own time. Our job is to make sure that when they are ready, they are given the guidance to do it right and to be safe. Being a parent is both a journey and a destination. I am enjoying my ride and the view is beautiful from where I sit.

Slow Saturday Morning

I have been remiss in saying that Cole hit a major milestone and we feel like we really are moving forward with potty training. He FINALLY pooped on the potty on Thursday and we went and bought him the pick-up truck and trailer he has been looking for since August. He is thrilled and was so proud of himself. He walked around saying, "Mama, I am so proud of you!" He is doing well while we are at home and tells me most of the time that he needs to potty. I am really proud of him and hope that this means that we only have one in diapers soon.

Saturdays mean that I get to walk further and get to sleep later. I was out just after 7 this morning and walked for 1.5 miles. Sasha followed me around until we left. Old dog, new trick :)

I am not an evergreen

Hooray for me! I was out again this morning with the dog and managed to hit the road just before 7. The bed was snugly and warm but I managed to drag myself out of it. Cole interrupted my slumber just before 6 when his diaper sprung a leak. Instead of changing his bed, I invited him to come to bed with us. I SHOULD have gone out then but it was still dark out and I couldn't be motivated enough to fight the urge so I huddled under the covers until the baby started to stir. I could hear my sneakers crying for me even louder and Sasha met me at the bottom of the stairs. We walk/jogged for about a mile and I am so proud of myself for doing it.

These walks give me some good time to meditate and I am finding the quiet voice inside me again. This voice gets silenced by the external voice of my toddler and the ongoing demands from my infant. This morning I mulled over the idea that any day can be the day that changes your life forever. I could find a winning lottery ticket today. That would surely change things. Something terrible could happen - to me or to a member of my family. Something wonderful could happen too! Carpe Diem and all that. These are things that I know - things we all know. I just reflected on this again this morning and am once again vowing to make the most of the days I am given and follow my new motto: "If you can, do." If I have the legs to walk, I will walk. If I have the means, I should do.

I can see the leaves starting to change and sport their autumn colors. The evergreens are stubbornly staying the same. If I were a tree, I would be a maple tree. They are useful, leave a sweet taste in your mouth, and their fall color is so brilliant. Like the maple, I am changing now too. I can feel it from my roots to my branches.

Cole is potty training again and seems to be responding to it well. We have had some accidents already this morning but I am prepared for them and he seems to be catching on. Here's hoping it sticks this time. I am ready and I think he is too.

Steps in the right direction

Well, while I struggled to get out of bed this morning and was later out the door than I had intended, I did get out and walked the dog. I didn't go as far as I had the day before but I plan on doing it again tomorrow and will try harder to get out before 7. I feel good for the commitment even though it is only the second day. We are also easing back into potty training and hope that this time it will be a successful transition for Cole...hoping.

You have to walk before you run

My husband, Chris, is a runner. He would disagree and say that he hasn't ran in over 2 years but I believe that if you are passionate about something, you never stop being that. I am an artist and say that even though I haven't picked up a paintbrush (other than to touch up walls around the house) in over 2 years. He will never not be a runner and I will never not be an artist in my eyes. I am not a runner. I have never had an ambition to be a runner. I run like an egg. Probably because, for most of my life, I was shaped like an egg. I am determined to be healthy for my boys and for myself. I eat the right foods but never feel like I will be in good physical shape since I don't have a regular exercise routine.
Yesterday, Chris found himself walking the 5K during the Baltimore Running Festival. The boys and I went out to help support his efforts but he was pretty disappointed in himself for not having trained to run it. Still, I see him as a runner. To me, the people who were warming up for the half marathon and the folks who were, at the same time, pushing their bodies to run the marathon, are no better than Chris. They are all runners and, while they take the time to condition their bodies to run the distance, I see Chris as having the same potential and, to me, that is good enough--and, something to be admired.
I decided yesterday, as I watched the overwhelming number of people at the peak of physical fitness, that I want to eat what I want. Stay with me here. People who exercise can eat what they want and I want that! I am going to be a runner! Okay, maybe not today or tomorrow but I really think I can do that too. I was out of the house before 7 this morning and walked the dog for about a mile and a half. I even jogged some of it. I will do it again tomorrow and continue, one day at a time. Maybe I will realize that I have asthma. Maybe I will get bad knees. Or maybe, just maybe, I will find that I am really a runner! I can be a runner and an artist...and eat what I want too!