Change is good?

Today was a late commute day so I had breakfast at home which was a slice of whole grain toast with one egg. This may be the beginning of my undoing.

I got to the office at 10:00 and wasn't too hungry. I had the rest of that salad from Monday in the fridge so I had planned on eating the rest of the greens in that along with the fruit and a few of the nuts. When noon rolled around, I grabbed it and ate it quickly. I threw away the container which still had the dressing, nuts and blue cheese - this is all about discipline, friends.

When I was ready to leave the office at 3 - honestly I have the best office hours in the biz - I was so hungry, it had my attention and that is really hungry for me. I grabbed a protein snack from our market at work which was about 1/2 cup chopped grilled chicken and 6 cubes of cheese. I ate it in the car on the drive home along with a bottle of sparkling water.

NOT ENOUGH! I was still very hungry when I got home and what I ate is a bit fuzzy but I believe was 1 kiwi and the rest of the steamed green beans from a few nights ago. I know it wasn't anything bad. THIS IS ABOUT DISCIPLINE, folks.

I texted Chris: I AM SO HUNGRY. He texted back: Do you want me to bring home pizza and wings? jk. NOT AT ALL FUNNY. I know he was joking. Does he know this is not a laughing matter? I am moving mountains here (mountains of fat) and this is completely serious business. I am hungry, cranky, and don't know what is going to be on the menu for supper. I am simply hungry and cannot make good decisions. My text back: For that, you get broiled fish and asparagus for dinner. I was serious until I got into the kitchen and determined that I didn't want floppy broiled fish. I want delicious, well thought-through fish - no time for that.

The boys asked for pizza, Chris offered pizza. There is no escaping pizza. That's when the little angels who keep me on track flew over to the pantry and shone the light on the whole wheat thin pizza crusts that I bought at Walmart last weekend. They sang a little too for good measure. I was grateful.

I made turkey pepperoni pizza for the boys and the above pictured gem for Chris and I. You can guess which side is mine? Mine has mushrooms, peppers, sliced tomato, red onions and olives with a sprinkling of feta cheese. Chris' has all of that but substitute feta for shredded cheddar/jack and add some pepperoni. The crusts were delicious, actually. My pizza ended up resembling a warm salad on a cracker but it was tasty,  hot, and seemed to satisfy me a little bit. I did eat half a crust (nearly) and know from not-so-simple math that the whole crust is 540 Calories so I ate 270 of that with my toppings. Not too shabby considering it was pizza, after all. 

I still have hunger pangs and am choosing to embrace the hunger as a sign that my stomach is shrinking and my body is being forced to use fat stores for energy so that extra space is irrelevant. That is my vision and I am sticking to it. I do think I need to work harder at having a better breakfast so that my lunch doesn't have to be so big, I can have a normal healthy snack and then won't be ravenous when I get home.

I wasn't able to carve out exercise time today and don't really see it happening since I just ate my salad/pizza. I may do some significant stretching and may run through a routine of warm-up exercises but not follow it with cardio. Movement is movement, for heaven's sake.